What are some your worst OLD experiences? I have only used Bumble so I have a few bad experiences on there. (and I don’t mean flat out ghosting) it’s story time!

What are some your worst OLD experiences? I have only used Bumble so I have a few bad experiences on there. (and I don’t mean flat out ghosting) it’s story time!


I went on a date once and the guy spent a lot of time talking about how he hated city life and he couldn’t wait until his parents died so he could own the farm he grew up on. Made a LOT of jokes about not even waiting until after funerals to move into the family farm. Implied I’d be with him moving onto the farm, somehow revealed that he probably wouldn’t use a cemetery for his parents burial, because they have so much land, maybe a peaceful spot on the Forrest. I was creeped out. Nearing the end of the date goodbye he snatched my hand with both his hands and held it to his chest for like a little hug. So yea, very focused on death and he hugged my hand.


Sounds like you went on a date with Dwight Shrute lol


This is so creepy but I laughed out loud at the hand hug. HAHAHA. So weird!!!!




Stories like this make me think to myself...'Self, you're pretty normal after all.' 😂😂😂


This is fine if your name is Self, otherwise pretty weird.


>So yea, very focused on death and he hugged my hand. Sounds like a vampire


Never bring death up on a first date, folks.


I matched with a guy whose profile was really good. Very nice looking, dressed really well, was a composer and he sent me videos of him playing piano. I was really impressed with his talent and we chatted for three weeks. Christmas was coming up and because of the pandemic, he told me he didn't want to meet until after the holidays since his mom is older and he didn't want to put her at any risks. Well, we met after Christmas and it was immediately clear that all his photos were ten or more years older. His blonde hair was now gray, he gained some weight and he was not dressed as impressively as his photos. On our date he smoked three cigarettes in the first hour of meeting and also brought his vape thing to not smoke as much in front of me. I quickly found out he didnt even have a piano and he lost his job over a year prior and was not actively searching for work. Prior to our meeting he was love-bombing me, telling me how special our connection was and he was also checking in on me whenever I went anywhere. I didn't initially notice these red flags until afterwards. I'm pretty sure he was trying to create an emotional connection before meeting so that I would accept him more easily. I felt completely fooled and took a break from dating. Just recently I restarted my tinder and his profile came up. I took a screen shot and sent it to my friend and she pointed out how his nice suit he was wearing, had all the price tags on it and he took the picture in a store dressing room.


Omg this story. I’m so sorry that you went through that. I lol’d at the dressing room pic. Some people really have a way of portraying themselves differently on a online dating profile. 🤦‍♀️


When I'm able to find matches on Facebook, I'm surprised by how old some of the photos the guys use are. One guy's photos were all 10 years old, so I didn't bother to meet him. another guy used a mix of photos, but his first photo which caught my attention was about 7 years old and he didn't look anything like that anymore -- none of his current photos were full body shots and he gained significant weight since then (he also had considerable dandruff in his hair and dressed really sloppily the only time we met). Two other guys grew out their hair -- one during the man-bun popularity peak, and that takes a siginificant amount of time. Man bun guy was still really clean and cute so I saw him a few times, but the other guy pretty much just let all hygiene go.


I wish we could sue people who use old pictures in OLD for false advertising lol


Matched with a guy who was a fellow teacher and whose profile said, “I can’t answer between 8-3 when I’m at school.” We texted, scheduled a date, then I said I was busy and would talk later that day. He sent several texts that afternoon. I responded once at night when I was home, then said good night. I woke up to text messages received at 11pm, 1am, and 4am. I was already feeling like something was off. I sent one text explaining I was going into work now (like him) would talk later. On my prep period a few hours later, I saw he had sent me 20 messages throughout the morning. He was planning all our future dates together and saying how my muscles must be aching from my commute and he so badly wanted to massage my body. I responded saying this was really intense and I thought it was best if we didn’t meet. I received 40 frantic messages in a row. At first he was apologetic, then defiant, then angry, then pleading. He said it was my loss because he had lots of money and knew how to treat a woman right. It was just a wild ride.


>knew how to treat a woman right \*Blinks\*


Sounds like he was going through the stages of grief pretty fast at the end lol


He lost his soulmate.


he lost his soul, mate


Sounds like cocaine


So much cocaine.


hey hey let’s not judge it might have been meth


Finally, a voice of reason.


Nice guy


Sounds sooo desperate and over the top. Wow he bombarded you so badly. I’m so sorry you had to experience that. Ugh... not sure this guy should be a teacher but 🤷‍♀️


lololol. as a teacher, you know that day was a movie day! in seriousness though, yikes.




Yikes how charming.


I once matched with a doctor on Hinge who told me he was very busy since he worked at the emergency room. Perfect, no big deal. We’ll talk when you have time. He then told me before we make plans to meet up that he wants to talk to me on FaceTime but only for 15 minutes to decide if he’d like to meet me or not. Okay.. so we FaceTime. This human looks nothing like his profile picture, asks me profound questions like it’s an interview process, and then about 5 minutes into it once I realize this isn’t a conversation but being GRILLED, he starts talking about his money and where he’d like to take me. I politely declined and said we were on different pages at this point. The whole thing was very icky.


I’ve confirmed repeatedly that most doctors I come across on dating apps have lower social skills than the average person. I wish it weren’t true, because dating a doctor sounds cool in theory. But I’ve yet to meet an engaging, interesting, not completely self-absorbed doctor on a dating app 😒


Most of the doctors I’ve chatted with on OLD are not, in fact, doctors


>*Most of the doctors I’ve chatted with on OLD are not, in fact, doctors* Ask for their (five or six) digit license number. You can verify.


Same - I’ve been on many dates with doctors and I think it’s watching too much “nanny fine” that I get impressed with that but I’m yet to be proven wrong. One is a gyno and I’ve seen him talk disgustingly about women. One started this huge political fight - can’t say discussion- shouting at me for an hour (first date and last), one assaulted me and left my place while I was in tears and shock with saying “you’re actually not that dumb”… haven’t met a good doctor and I stay away from them. Same with finance people/banking.


Met a cute guy on OLD, said he worked in marketing and we messaged back and forth for a while until finding the time to meet up. During the texting getting to know you part before meeting he would say things like I’m going to work will message you after my meeting etc. We finally meet up and he spills the beans that he doesn’t actually have a job, he was just released from prison for rape, but he didn’t do it, it was a misunderstanding. I try to be understanding give benefit of the doubt until I can look more into it, but ask why did you lie about having a job and not being able to talk because you were going into meetings? Proceeded to lie some more to me. After the date I looked it up, his case actually made the news and there really was no doubt the guy was guilty of it. Scared me away from OLD for a while after that.


This would scared the hell out of me.


Similar experience, except found out my date had killed a man’s in his house six months ago. Reading the description, he left the argument returned with a gun, and shot the guy. He didn’t tell me about it—he told me enough wild stories during our one dinner that I spent a good amount of time googling to verify. When I saw the article and the picture, I went cold. Scared me off of one app forever, and made me go through a lot of “wtf is wrong with me that I went out with him and didn’t have any red flags besides the lying.” Saddest thing is, that was the nicest and most conscientious guy I’ve talked to since my divorce.


This was genuinely my fear when I started using OLD!


So scary! I matched with a convicted sex offender who gave me a false last name. Luckily my friend did a reverse image search when I couldn’t find any evidence of his existence online and we saw the updated annual photo in the registry. OLD can be incredibly scary. I stayed offline for a while.


I wonder how he zeroed in on "marketing" as his fake career.


My guess is that marketing is a term that sounds fancy/technical and you could probably BS your way through it if someone asked you questions about what you do.


If he lied about that, he'll lie about everything else.




That is astoundingly ridiculous. Pathologically lying and a rapist… I guess it checks out


The "meetings" were probably meetings with his parole officer or a sex offender group session.


Met a guy on bumble, we texted and talked for a while before meeting up, so felt pretty good about him. Went to a bar and the bar ended up closing early because they had an unexpected leak. So (and I know this wasn’t smart) I invited him back to my place for another drink. As soon as we get to my place, he gets super awkward. Like not talking, being weird. I eventually say, it’s getting late and I tired so let’s call it a night. Silence from him. I tell him he needs to call an Uber, so he takes out his phone, pretends to push some buttons then puts his phone away. 10 minutes later, I ask him where is Uber is and he shrugs and says they must have forgotten him. Meanwhile he never even looked at his phone again. I tell him he needs to wait outside. He tells me I need to just go to bed and he’ll wait inside. I say again, he needs to go. He walks right past me and the door and proceeds to my bathroom. Tells me I can’t deny him the use of my bathroom and closes himself in there for a good 10-15 minutes. He finally comes out and I tell him if he doesn’t leave I’m going to have to call the police. He looks me dead in my eyes and says, word for word, How long do you think it will take for them to get here? At that point, my fairly large dog must of picked up on the tension and starts growling at him. He leaves. I couldn’t figure out where he went, but waited for an Uber to come to make sure he gets in and actually leaves. So I watching out the window and a car pulls up. He comes out of hiding, walks up to my car, kicks in my car door (dents and cracked the paint), gets in the Uber and leaves. I also had one guy show up on a first date disabled, without ever mentioning it prior. So that was super awkward.


Woah, that’s a scary situation, I definitely hope you changed the locks after that, I feel like he sounds like the kind of guy that might come back and cause more trouble. Glad you had a dog, I can’t imagine if he took things even further. I would have been tense and freaking out internally if I was in that situation. I’m so sorry you had to experience this level of creepiness, I hope your car wasn’t overly damaged. That’s on another level of handling rejection badly and just being a terrible human being. Stay safe out there !


Yes, was definitely scary. The next day I had 3 outdoor cameras installed. He never came back, thankfully. Every time I see him on a dating app I report him.


Good job! I’m glad you got the cameras! And yes I would report him too!


My god. I can't believe people have to deal with things like this. I've never had a OLD horror story. Hopefully I can be a breath of "normal" air for any traumatized daters geez


Holy shit what a murderer thing to say, good dog


What the fuck. This thread is full of awkward and creepy stories, but this one is downright terrifying. I’m so sorry you had to go through that with this absolute maniac.


May I ask what happened with the disabled guy


Matched with him, talked for a bit and decided to meet up for dinner. He got there super early, which I thought was odd, but whatever. So I get there and I’m noticing little things are super off. He had a really hard time pouring water into his glass, he was holding his fork really strangely, and sometimes he wasn’t getting the fork into his mouth and would hit himself in the face with the fork. I couldn’t figure out what was going on. I started to notice he wasn’t using his left arm at all. At some point he mentioned something about a surgery, so I delved into that. Turns out he had a tumor removed and it paralyzed his arm. But, there must of also been some neurological damage as well because he was having a hard time just eating. It was all very awkward and I was upset that he didn’t mention any of this prior to the date. I get that it sucks, and it was an unavoidable medical problem, but it was very uncomfortable and not at all what I was expecting. We made it through dinner, I told him I wasn’t really feeling a connection, I paid for the whole meal and left. He never got up to leave, so not even sure if there were other issues with walking or not. But I did realize why he got there so early was because he got dropped off.


Aww while I do feel bad for him lying gets you nowhere and it would have made so much more sense to just be honest. This is why I fucking hate OLD. People just seem to lie and lie and it’s so offputtting. But from now on fuck it if they’ve catsfished me they’re getting left and I won’t feel a type of way about it because there’s no need to lie and I don’t know why they think that improves their chances because history tells us 10/10 it doesn’t


I agree that people shouldn’t lie in their profiles but I do feel for this guy. It doesn’t sound like he was maliciously hiding his disability, maybe just wanted to feel normal again. Or maybe being newly disabled, he had a problem with communicating it to others.


I hope you bought your dog a steak. He may have literally saved your life.


Bet your dog got a big treat after that


Christ. Had a roommate have something like that happen. Just a guy friend from HS she ran into after he'd been out of state for a few years. Then just wouldn't take any hints to leave. Said she was relieved when I finally got home (he left like, 5 minutes after I got there). Told her to call me if that shit ever happened again. "I'm a fifteen minute walk away and all my bosses are women. They'll get it."


WTF??? Now this one *is* scary.


My name is pretty unique and my job title narrows it all down even further. Woman I did not match with decided to find me and call my office directly. She chatted with my assistant and explained she was certain we'd be great together. My assistant ultimately transferred her to me and she gave me a similar explanation. No Mallory, I'm still not interested in taking a chance on someone who just has a "sense" about these things.


Lol wow she took a ‘sense’ pretty far! 😆


My time to shine! So I matched with a guy and chatted a bit. He seemed nice enough, and this was my first try at dating after an 8 year relationship, so maybe I was rusty at telling who was a weirdo or not. So we decided to meet at a bar for a drink. He wanted to meet near him, so I drove across town to meet. It ended up being his local spot so he knew everyone, which was awkward at best. We sat down and ordered drinks. I had one drink I nursed since I had to drive later. He proceeded to have a beer with a shot about 5 times over and got very drunk. He then regaled me with his life story. Here's where it gets awful. He had recently gotten out of a 10 year prison stint for attempted murder! WTF. He beat the crap out of some guy with his skate board and almost killed him. It was not self defense as the guy he tried to kill had said something rude to a woman. Dude, not an excuse for murder! Now he fights MMA as a hobby. Talk about anger issues. So now I'm in a bar, with a drunk felon surrounded by his friends who obviously think it's totally cool to be friends with someone who tried to kill another person. He then wanted a ride home because he isn't allowed to drive due to too many DUIs. I told him I had to get home to let my dogs out and I ran away and blocked him. Yikes! Quite the experience for my first date after 8 years. Lol. At least I got a story out of it and didn't get murdered!


Wtf!!! Woah that’s crazy! I’m so sorry that you had to experience that! After an 8 year relationship! Wow first one after it too. What an experience/story. Also, you are not the only one on here that has happened to meet a murderer. Yikes! I hope you’ve had many better experiences since! Lol


I met a guy on OLD in an area I was considering moving to. , We chatted for a few weeks before finally meeting up. This was during covid, so we agreed to meet outside and go for a walk. He was a psychologist whose wife had passed away from breast cancer a few years ago. They were childhood sweethearts. He was just getting back in to dating. He asked me to meet at his office. When I was almost there he let me know he was going to meet me out front and to just pull up front, and we'd head to a hiking trail nearby. Our first outing went really well. He was funny, kind, and intelligent. The conversation just flowed naturally for about three hours. I gave him a ride back to his office, and we agreed to meet up again the next day to walk around a small touristy village nearby. We met our front of his office again. He explained that he had friends visiting and that he leant them his car to drive up to a nearby city for a couple of days. We stopped to grab food and he reached for his wallet and realized he didn't have it. He had left it in his car. So, I paid for our lunch. It was another great day of conversation. He was really open about his life and everything he'd gone through since his wife passed. We met up again two days later. He still didn't have his car, so I drove and bought lunch again. At some point in the day he wanted to share some pictures from his phone. It was a pretty low grade model with a badly cracked screen. It just felt off that a professional who spends a great deal of time on the phone would not have replaced it. That, coupled with the car and wallet left me with a bad feeling. But, we were really enjoying each other's company. So, I agreed to have him visit me at my home out of state. We were making plans by phone. After hanging up I received a text from him explaining that he had suffered major depression after his wife died and had a friend stay with him who robbed him by selling everything of value in the house and emptying his bank account while he was out of town dealing with his wife's affairs. He was so devastated that he wound up losing his home and was now living in a shelter. I decided to do some digging at this point and checked his license to practice in the state he's lived in for the past 20 years. There was no record of him being licensed in any way there. I checked the two other states he claimed to have lived in and found nothing in them either. I then did a public record check on him and discovered that he had recently been released from prison for identity theft, fraud, and stalking. He also had multiple arrests for violating protection orders and harassment going back more than 15 years. He kept texting and calling me even after I told him to stop. I blocked him and am incredibly thankful that he didn't ever know my last name or where I live. *edit: typos


This one scares me.


Yikes!! What a story!


Jesus christ...this is terrifying


No kidding. I seriously dodged a bullet on this one.


This was about 10-12 years ago. So I would have been in my early 20’s. I was using OKCupid and at the time, they had it to where you could answer a ton of random questions and see the other person’s answers. I went on a date with a guy where we decided just to go for a walk through a park and chat. We ended up going through the list of questions from the app for conversation starters. He decided to ask me what my thoughts on abortion were. Weird first date question but I answered it - it’s not something I would choose to do but I stand by whatever another woman decides is right for her. Since he asked me, I figured I should ask him back. His answer - “I think it’s okay until the 9th trimester.” In my head I’m like, poor guy doesn’t understand how pregnancy works. So I explained that there are only 3 trimesters. Then he says “I know. I think it’s okay to euthanize a kid up until 1 year old.” Do what now?! O.o He went on to explain that if a parent couldn’t handle it or just changed their mind, they could put the kid down like an animal. Why not adoption? Because then tax payers have to pay for the kid and he didn’t want his tax money going to that. Needless to say I got out of there fast.


Omg my jaw just dropped. I would have ran. Lol


He even had the audacity to try to make himself sound reasonable by saying there was a politician who thought it was okay until the kid was 2. Fucking c-r-a-z-y


That is mind blowing to me. Definition of get-the-f***-out-of-there moment. I can’t imagine how this person turned out. Lol


Not only is he obviously crazy and apparently anti-kid, but he's not even good at math. A child at 1 year of post birth age is not 9 trimesters old.


The bad at math definitely didn’t help the situation. 🤣


Omg I remember those questions! There was one something along the lines of "is it possible to rape somebody you're married to", and the number of people who said 'no' was appalling. A good way to help screen out rapists, mind you.


Hahaha, WOW. This one might take the cake. What an edge lord.


So, I'll usually say I support abortion up till the 57th trimester, but it's clearly a joke. Who the hell would actually suggest it's okay to just pop a kid?


First one on this thread where I audibly gasped what the fuck dude


First "felt safe enough to meet someone outside" date since the pandemic began. He asked me about my "5yr plan". Said I was thinking of finally pulling the trigger on getting a dog, love pets, etc. He went off for about 5min about how "it's so strange that people domesticated animals" and "pets are for people who can't handle *real* relationships". At which point I tried to like lighten the mood and said something like, ok so you're not a pet person, tell me about something you're into. But he wouldn't let the pet thing go (mind you, I have no pet or any solid leads on a pet) and then pivoted to interrogating me about how I'd take care of said pet if we were dating. At this point I was done with it and was just like, look it's ok that you don't like pets. Finally he revealed that the last girl he dated dumped him bc he was allergic to her cat. We both agreed to end the date about 2min after that.


I went on a date with a guy who went on and on about how much he hates dogs. I have two. He told me I would have to get rid of my dogs to date him. I said we weren’t a match and he was offended I would chose a dog over a human.


Wow, what a piece of work. Every time a guy tells me he dislike or allergic to cats I tell them straight up that I am not interested. I will never ever give up my pets for a human, my pets will never wake up one day and tell me that they don't love me anymore and they've found someone else.. LOL!


Same. Gizmo(my cat) and I are a package deal. If a lady doesn't like cats, it wasn't meant to be.


This is why I think it’s a good idea to have one nice pet pic (with yourself in it also) in your profile. My dog means the world to me. I would laugh in someone’s face and leave them with the check if they had the gall to insinuate I get rid of my pup for them. It’s not even just the pets are family stuff. I’ve had this dog since he was two months, I’m all he knows, I took on the task of caring for him. What level of scumbag does one have to be at to even want to date someone who would abandon a helpless creature who was their responsibility they took on willing, let encourage that behavior? Gross.


Oh trust me, my profile has pictures of my cats and I would even blatantly write “cat lady”. But it doesn’t stop men who dislike pets or allergic to pets from messaging me. 🤦🏻‍♀️


Ah, you’re right. I’ve been out of the game long enough I forgot the safest place to hide intimate details about yourself is your OLD profile. 🤣


When a guy reveals he has a shedding dog or cat I unmatch/distance. I would never expect someone to get rid of a pet. If I stuck around I would have hives. Then my eyes to swell out of my head while I was sleeping. Wake up not even able to open my eyes! It sucks when your feeling someone but they have dog/cat. Love animals but they make me ill even with allergy medicine. Luckily this is something most people learn early on. Not to involved. 😌


My friend went on a date and he bought his dog in the car. They had prearranged to go to a restaurant and the dog couldn’t go in. It was a fancy-ish place so it would have been obvious the dog wasn’t allowed. The guy left the dog in the car but went to check up on said dog every 10 minutes. Apparently goes no where without the dog. My friend also has a dog but she found his behaviour so odd/off putting there wasn’t a second date.


He could’ve said he was allergic to cats and then moved on 😂


I matched someone once who was quite interesting, funny, and intelligent over the phone. We met in person and they show up basically in sweats and a ball cap, and then summarily goes into a TED talk about how difficult it is to be "single, attractive, and accomplished." The rest of the conversation was similarly negative and complaint-driven. I was constantly scanning the bar for people I could convince to pretend to be a long lost friend to get me out of the conversation until the date ended. I think they needed a therapist, not a date.


I’ve learned to take it as a red flag if someone shows up in sweats and ball cap tbh. But aside from that, sound alike a whole lotta issues! Glad you were able to identify it quickly. Lol I’m not a fan of being around constant complainers.


Ok so I can relate to the Facebook thing. I have 2 stories. Let me preface this by saying my last name, nor my phone number, nor my town is on my social media profiles. First story— I matched with someone in February, we talked on the phone and I didn’t feel any connection. He wasn’t engaging and he was talking over me. He was a bit of a dick (seemed angry and/or bitter). I ghosted him because I could tell something was off and I didn’t want to tell him I wasn’t interested because I figure he may react. In April, I got a friend request from him on Instagram. I delete it. HE SENDS ANOTHER. I delete it and block him. Then a few days ago (it is now mid-June), I get a friend request on Facebook from him! My stomach turned. I blocked him. Second story— I matched with someone on Bumble. We talk on & off for about an hour and I find zero interest in him. He’s another one who I didn’t feel I could explain myself to. He seemed... not right. I ended up completely deleting my Bumble account because I (mentally) need a dating break. THIS GUY proceeds to find me on Facebook and messaged me. “Where did you go?” I reply “...How did you find my Facebook?” He goes “Well... it wasn’t easy. You’re not easy to find. Why? Is this creepy?” ...Needless to say, I blocked him.


Depending on your settings, if you have each other's numbers, Facebook and Instagram serve you up as a suggested friend. I've had various guys I've chatted with come up as suggested friends. Also, one of my banking apps checks my contacts to suggest folks I might want to send cash to, this also gives their full name.




The only good thing about this story is how it ended. Glad the asshole came after you when you had your entire Rugby team there as backup.


Lol @ unmitigated hot mess. Lying and stalking, what a package deal!


Woah this guy took things sooo far... honestly he sounds like he could come up with a complete different identity. I’m so sorry he took it as far as to go to your rugby match! He sounds very desperate and willing to do anything. Smh crazy how this all came out after one date. I hope he hasn’t bugged you anymore.


I was waiting for a bus and just felt . . .stared at (you know the feeling). It was some random dude. He was angry. Apparently he swiped right on me on tinder, recognized me and *decided to accost me for being a stuck up bitch who thinks I'm too good for him.* The stuck up part, no, but he was bang on about the too good for him part.


Being recognized in public from my profile is always a concern of mine…..


I had an Uber driver do this once then started harassing me for my phone number


I have a few, but these come to mind: I met up for drinks with a guy at a bar (his choice). He was already there and had ordered himself water. He was acting weird, not making eye contact, and told me he didn’t drink, which is fine, but why choose a bar? After a little while talking he told me that his therapist told him to go on dates to practice interacting with people, and asked if I could give him feedback on how he was doing. Turns out he was not interested in dating- the date was a homework assignment from his therapist. I felt like this was something he could have mentioned in advance. Another one: I met up with a guy at a bar in my neighborhood. It was going ok until his mom called. He’s gone taking with her for 5-10 minutes. I thought it was an emergency. Nope. Just wanted to chat about the cute things his cat was doing. At their house. Turns out he neglected to mention that he lived with his mom. She knew he was on a date but wanted to talk cats anyway, and apparently he did too. That told me right away there’s no way this guy’s mom is ever letting go of him.


I feel like the therapist meant he should actually try a normal date and to take it seriously. A therapist wouldn't tell you to go engage with people in such a shallow pointless manner to get a bit of validation that you're a good conversationalist lmao He probably only heard the first part of what the therapist was saying and said SOUNDS GOOD!


Nothing too terrible, which I’m grateful for! BUT there have been some odd experiences with two men who I think must have been mentally ill or something like that. The weird part is when I unmatched them, they found me on Facebook, Instagram, and LinkedIn and tried reaching out to me there. I blocked them everywhere but it was a bit startling. I also have one funny story about a guy from OLD who asked for my # and called me. When I called him back he was weirdly angry at me for some reason. I tried chatting with him a bit and he was like “you don’t realize this but we know each other!” And I had no idea what he was talking about. He said we had a mutual friend, but I had never heard of that person before. I looked them up on FB while we were on the phone, not connected. Then it hit me…. He totally thought I was someone else. I don’t know who he thought he was on the phone with, but it was NOT me and that was pretty awkward.


Oh jeez, super awkoooo 🌮 😂


Reminds me of a much more positive experience I had when I swapped a couple of messages with a woman on a dating site. I asked her a question about something in her profile (why Voyager was her favorite Star Trek series) and never heard back. A couple of years later, I met and hit it off with a couple of women (who knew each other) at the wedding of some mutual friends in the same community. We became friends and had a group chat going for awhile. I think it took about a year or more before one of my friends brought it up, but turns out one of them was the Voyager fan who never answered my question (I guess she was worried I would be angry or something—fair enough). She has recognized me, but I actually had no memory of itand didn't connect her to that one message on OLD, but after thinking back really hard, I remembered asking about Voyager. So I eventually got the answer to my question. (Basically, "because Janeway".)


One day I randomly got a text “hey, you might not remember me but we were chatting on [app] and I just got a new phone and found your number.” And I responded pretty positively, but I did not remember this person so I asked for his FB and he said he doesn’t have social media. He sent me a photo and I had no memory of ever chatting with this person. It seemed pretty sketch, so I just let the convo die. A few weeks later I got an EMAIL with the same message. Same exact message. “Hey you might not remember me but we were chatting on [app] and I just got a new phone and found your email.” As if we hadn’t just chatted via text? I ignored that one. THEN a few months after that, I got the SAME MESSAGE AGAIN on text. I finally responded that this was the third time he told me that he had “just gotten a new phone” and maybe he should keep better track of his contacts. It was…. Very odd.


Sounds like a phishing scam tbh.


Sounds like a scam bot.


What the actual f!!!! So weird! Lol almost sounds like a phone scammer


I had a similar experience as you several years ago. Naively told a guy I worked at Applebee’s and he just showed up one night. Hadn’t even met him. He sat at the bar because I was working the “horseshoe” section of tables around the bar. I didn’t speak to him, would barely even look at him. He was texting me the whole time, saying things like “I’d be such a good boyfriend to you” and other way too fast and slightly creepy things. Also that I should smile more. Bro I’m not smiling because I’m sick to my stomach that you’re here. I just stayed in the kitchen as much as possible to hide. Nowadays if something like that happened I’d have the guy kicked out almost immediately but back then I didn’t really know how to handle it and didn’t want to seem rude. He finally left without me ever speaking a word to him. The bartender told me he kept staring at me and asking her questions about me. Said he had a reallllll creepy vibe. He stalked me on social media for a few years after that. I’d block him and he’d create another profile and try to follow or friend me again. Haven’t heard from in a maybe 3-4 years now so that’s a relief.


Woah! That’s super creepy vibe! I kinda forget if he messaged me on bumble while he was at my place. He might have, I’ve just blocked out most of the memory because it made me so uncomfortable. It really does make you sick to your stomach, I wish I could have hid. Honestly, if it happened now, I’d personally just tell them to leave my restaurant because I am trying to do my work and I don’t appreciate them being there when I hardly know them. Even take it as far as the call the police if it went bad. Definitely not as naive now. A few years!!! Wow the guy didn’t let it go! Glad he finally stopped tho. But wow! Sorry you had to go through this!


Had a first date, went great. Made plans for a second date, where I was picking her up from her apartment. Things seem to be going fine, we text periodically the day between dates 1 and 2. We hadn't set a time yet, so at ~7pm the night before, I text her asking when she wanted me to pick her up. No response, so morning of, I give her a call at ~10 to ask when she wanted me to get there. She picks up, says hello, as soon as I say hi, she hangs up. Like, I to this day have no idea what was up with that.


Had a date 3 weeks ago. We were talking constantly and things seemed, to me anyway, to be going great. Morning of she says she'll see me at 11 and was super excited. An hour later I get a text that says she's too anxious, can't do it and that was the last I heard from her. I know the feeling man.


Yeah if she couldn't respond to the text then a phone call is too much Don't put more energy into people who won't give any back. She wasn't into you, hopefully you've since learned to read that


Went on a date with this guy who first showed up with dirty nails. Then he was showing me houses on Redfin he wants to buy for me to move into. He told me how much money he has in the bank. So much money that his ex GF stole thousands to get her body done and he didn’t notice it was gone. Then he tried to show me nude photos of said ex to show me what he money bought. I asked for the check. While waiting, he told me another story about this he went down on his then girlfriend’s best friend thinking it was the girlfriend because they looked alike. The girlfriend walked in during and went crazy. The best friend was saying she couldn’t help it herself because it was so good. The date lasted one drink before I had to get out of there but he still managed to fit all of those inappropriate stories in before I left. I did have a good laugh about it with my friends. He also called a bunch of times looking for a second date but I ghosted and blocked.




Yup. I'll be honest. I'm a warehouse worker. No money. But my credit score is legit fantastic. Because apparently the way crippling depression manifested for me was spending ages 22-to now going to work and paying bills on time.


Lol! Wtf!!! That would have made me so uncomfortable. Wow he really let it all out on the first date, lol sounds like the first 10 minutes. I’m glad its something you can laugh at now, I can’t believe people share the things they do sometimes and think it’s okay. Ew lol


Dirty fingernails legit turn my stomach, I wouldn’t be able to stop looking at them kudos to you for lasting the drink lol


How could a person go down on the wrong person? “Looking alike” doesn’t make that possible.


Matched with “Jason” and had good convos. We decide to meet up a week after thanksgiving. I text to plan a time and he replies that he can’t go out on a date with me Thursday “or ever.” I am confused but he says he started seeing someone and thought he should only see one person at a time. I thank him for being straightforward and go on my merry way. Two weeks later he texts me with, “it didn’t work out.” No hello or any small talk. I tell him sorry to hear that but I’m not interested because he had a chance and has to live with his decision. He spews an hour of messages about how dare I and blah blah. I’m barely responding one word in between paragraphs of his insulting and woe-is-me messages and she was a lying bitch. He ends it with, “I’m sorry but do you still want to give it a shot?” Hard pass. I block him on all platforms. End of story. Just kidding. Three months pass. He has a new dating profile with the name Jay and all the same pics. Messages, “hey remember me?” Dodged a bullet and am 99% sure the other woman he was “dating” realized he was bad news.


My very first experience with OLD, match with a guy who seems cute. He’s very funny, same age, same taste in music/movies. Chat for a while and he asks me to go hiking. I say eh maybe somewhere public is a better idea. He says oh this trail is very popular there will be tons of people on a weekend day. I say ok but don’t be surprised when I show up open carrying. (I always hike visibly armed, bad experience where I’m pretty sure I almost got kidnapped) He says oh man I wish I could still carry. I’m thinking maybe he sold off his pistol? Nope he’s a convicted felon. Goes on to clarify he did major time for interstate drug trafficking. Same guy also was kind enough to give me a heads up that he has no teeth. By his account he got hit in the face with a log and they all were broken. I’m assuming it was probably meth? Never did actually meet him.


I’ve been reading this thread for a while and this one is my favorite. 😂😂


It's possible a drug dealer hit him. back in my Xanned out days I def hung out with really dumb people who would do stupid shit like try to rip off a very large scary drug dealer, and they wouldn't hesitate to hit them with brass knuckles.


I could see that but he had no teeth. Not just some missing. Sounded more like they rotted than they got knocked out.


I matched with a woman on Raya. We had great chats and set a restaurant/ bar to meet up at. I braved the traffic and got there and she messaged me that there was a family emergency and couldn't make it. It was a specific family emergency. Her uncle died. I got this message after I was waiting for her for about 20 minutes. So I precede to go about my night and make the best of it. 2 hours in... look who decides to show up to the bar!! It was definitely her. She's drunk and with her friends. I got some liquid courage and went up to give her condolences and she had no clue what was going on. "EW.... what are you talking about?!" her face when she realized was priceless.


I just heard about Raya...how is it? Dating app of the future?


OMG wow. What a way to find out.... serves her right for blowing you off like that. I hope she was embarrassed as hell.


A month or two ago, I matched with a guy on tinder. We had a bit of back and forth and he seemed cool enough. He said that he preferred to meet up quickly rather than chat back and forth and did I want to go for a drink? So I was like, yeah, sure, tonight? (if we're gonna do this let's just do it you know?) and we made plans to meet at a bar very close to my apartment (I'm not paying for ubers to meet a guy I barely know. So I get there, he's 20 minutes late. We start chatting, and it's clear there is not really any attraction between us. I'm basically just waiting til my drink is finished to politely end the date. He is drinking a pint of beer, and absolutely downing it. Half way through his beer he has to go to the bathroom, and he's gone for like 10 minutes. So he comes back, im drinking my drink and we're chatting, I mention that cars get broken into at night sometimes around my neighbourhood. He stands up, and says "I have to move my car" and leaves Dude texts me a minute later to say, I had to go but I paid the tab. I still have a half a drink but I'm already so irritated that I get up to leave, and turns out he paid NOTHING and blocked my number lmaooooo So I paid the tab, and reported him on tinder for bad offline behaviour lmao It was so weird. He didn't unmatch me on tinder right away so I told him what I thought of him at least Lol


Wow, that’s a terrible human being right there, taking advantage of the situation and getting free drink. I’m sure karma will get his ass. Lol I’m glad you got to say what you needed to before he unmatched. He deserves that. Lol damn.. I’m sorry you had to deal with someone so weird!!!




I got ghosted in the middle of a date. We met up for coffee and (I thought) were hitting it off. I was planning to do some archery at an outdoor range afterwards and invited him to join in. We did some shooting, then the plan was to drive separately to a restaurant and grab lunch. I drove from the archery range to the restaurant, meanwhile he unmatched and stopped replying to texts and was never heard from again.


Crazy Take: Were you better at archery than he was?


When I was in grad school, I worked for the university to get free tuition. My package included an on campus apartment, and unfortunately they made this easy to find on the school’s website, along with publicly listing my office location. My office was fairly isolated from others and anyone could walk in and find me alone most of the time. Because of this, I would be coy about my full name and job until I got to know people. Unfortunately, potentials would use that as a challenge to find me. If you live on or near a college campus, bumble puts your location as “university of X” rather than just your town, so unfortunately that sparked many conversations about why I was on campus late every night. They really need to get rid of that. A few times I received screenshots of my work headshot, or someone saying “how do you like working in X building?”, or even receiving calls and voicemails on my work line from dudes. So creepy!! They acted as if I’d be impressed by their sleuthing.


As an undergrad they used to public list our dorm info too! Or maybe you had to be on the campus network. Either way, a TA in my CS class pulled my information up, in class, for everyone to see as an example of how to use the system. Yea, they don’t list that shit anymore. I filed a raging complaint and I’m wondering how many other women had similar things happen or experienced stalking behavior because of it. But that was 15 year ago. I’m surprised they still publicly list stuff like that. Have you asked if they can remove some of the info?


Oh lord. You made me recall that time my prof in Uni whispered to me, asking if I went to a specific uni in Europe previously, mind you we never spoke before. The kicker is that he did that in a middle of a test and that info was on my LinkedIn or maybe my student profile. Why was he looking me up and why the hell did he felt the need to ask me when he already had the answer !? I felt so creeped out and awkward I barely could concentrate for the rest of my exam.


It amazes me how Tinder used to give distances down to like, hundreds of feet, *and didn't fuzz location data at all*. Like, how in the hell is that anything but a terrible idea?! It's some basic high school geometry to figure out where someone lives if you know exactly how far away someone is.


I usually meet guys for a drink or a coffee on a first date because it’s short and inexpensive. If we don’t like each other then we haven’t wasted much time or money. I broke that rule one time and it was a disaster. The guy suggests going to a really nice restaurant for our first date. I’m hesitant but I figure that if he is suggesting such a place, he must be paying for it so I agree. We meet and he looks like his photos and is nice. He chooses our food which I think is weird but again, he’s obviously paying so I’ll go along with it. I ponder having another drink and he says “go ahead! Order whatever you want”. Then the bill comes and as always, I am going to offer to split it (even though he had made it quite obvious that he was paying; it’s the polite thing to do). I didn’t even get a chance to reach for my wallet when he very rudely says “we’re splitting this”. I was taken off guard so I laugh and say “you didn’t even give me the chance to offer” and he says “I don’t care if you offer or not. You’re paying your share”. Now that is just downright RUDE. He was super aggressive about it. So I pay and we walk outside and he tries to kiss me and I pull away because I never want to see this man again. Then he asks for a ride home because he actually doesn’t drive. I tell him no and I leave. (We were down town in a big city so there were lots of ways for him to get home). Worst date of my life.


I wish men like this would put in their profile ‘I am heterosexual but I hate women and distrust them all’


I was on OK Cupid for around 24 hours before de-activating it due to the sheer admin involved. Anyway, some guy saw my profile and was apparently mid-message to me when I deactivated. So rather than go, 'oh, okay, she probably isn't looking for someone right now,' he tracked me down on Facebook (which did have a different profile picture) and sent me an EXTREMELY LONG message about how he suspected we were soulmates.


I remember I kept getting super hearted by a guy on match dot com. I had no kids listed under preference and my age range was like 21-24 because I was a baby at this time; he was a middle aged dad with like several children. So the age gap on that was weird already. Made me roll my eyes and think "can't you read my profile buddy? I don't want seven step kids." After being ignored he messaged me which I did not answer. He did the "super heart" thing several more times because there wasn't a limit to how many pics you could do it on or whatever and I got annoyed and blocked him. Like 3 years later I cleaned out my spam folder on Facebook and this asshole had found my personal FB and written me saying "he can't contact me on the app" lol It must have automatically put it in the spam folder. I have a pretty uncommon first name so I probably showed up right away on search results. So creepy.


Men's answers - got catfished, used to pay for meals, ghosted for no reason Women's answers - got raped, threatened to get murdered, stalked, harassed, creeped/grossed tf out Maybe all the men's horror stories are all the way at the bottom? I initially thought it was funny to point out maybe all the guys who got ghosted were the guys being creepy and gross. But seriously ladies...christ! My story is a girl I hooked up with through my job told me on our hangouts that she basically had strong ties to the criminal underworld and had a murder vendetta against a man that drugged and date raped her (understandable but still scary for my milk-white naive innocent and near-compulsively law-abiding sweet guy self) and cutely/giggly said she would "find me" if I ghosted her. Lol.


Met this sweet guy on FB dating and we talked and texted for a week. Finally met for ice cream then took a nice walk in a park. We held hands and just talked. A nice, old fashioned kind of date. Next morning I woke up to X-rated pictures AND a video. Needless to say I said I thought we were looking for different things and said see ya! 🤦‍♀️


Matched with a girl a couple years ago on tinder. Conversation was great and I knew she was a real person since we had a mutual acquaintance from long ago so I was sure she wasn’t a catfish. We seemed to hit it off right away, however we couldn’t get our schedules to match up for a first date initially. 2 weeks later I had bought tickets to see John wick 3 but my movie buddy dropped out at the last second and I was stuck holding an extra ticket for the later that night. In a last ditch effort to not go alone I asked if she wanted to go knowing it was super last minute, a late night showing and we had yet to meet in person. To my surprise, she said yes and agreed that I would pick her up in a few hours before the movie started. I go to pick her up that evening, park by her place and texted her I was there. She replies “one minute!” and I suddenly get a call from my movie buddy apologizing again for having to bail. I told him no worries, I have a date lined up and she’s on her way to the car currently so I have to go. She opens the door and gets into the car just as I was hanging up so I didn’t notice anything right away, but as I turned to say hello that’s when I saw it. The biggest baby bump I had ever seen. She decides to come clean that she was actually 6-7months pregnant and had failed to mention that anywhere on her profile or during our prior conversations out of fear that she’d be judged. Better yet, she still lived with her baby’s daddy but him and his new girlfriend were moving out later that week so “it’s okay”. I wasn’t sure how to react in the moment because I was caught off guard but the movie was starting soon and I didn’t want to waste the tickets so I just went ahead with it. But boy was it super awkward lol. Safe to say things never went past the first date. The kicker was a few months later I seen her again on another dating app but this time her second profile picture was her ultrasound photo with the caption “looking for a daddy”. So at least she was being honest now I guess.


😳😳😳.....but seriously, 😳


>I wasn’t sure how to react in the moment because I was caught off guard but the movie was starting soon and I didn’t want to waste the tickets so I just went ahead with it. Wow, this would be a tough one to process in the moment. Like, any normal date you bail, but she's already in the car and you wanna be on time for JW3. 🤷🏼‍♂️


I’m so sorry but this is hilarious lmao. I can barely even think of a more awkward scenario. At least you got a good story out of it!


But did you enjoy the movie though?


Not my story, but in the depths of covid I had a few video dates and a lot of chatting with a woman who lives maybe 5-6 hours drive from me. She was interesting and attractive, but nothing ever came of it. We did enjoy chatting while quarantined, though. Let's call her Liz. Anyway...she met a guy when they were both volunteering at an art show. They're on their 3rd date sipping wine in a restaurant. She's on her third glass when he says that he's "been away" for a long time. "Away, like out of the country?", she asks. Apparently he'd been away like in jail for killing his wife. He'd hit her on the head with the lid of the toilet tank. Liz said she spit wine into her glass when he told her. The waitress was heading over to check on them, saw the look on Liz's face, and turned right around and walked away.


I had written in my profile that I'm in recovery from hard drugs (I only wanted to match with people who knew in advance). One guy messaged me, "Want me to help you relapse?" I replied back this wasn't gonna work out, I was looking for a serious relationship, and not a using buddy. He took it well, and we unmatched. But man, did it make me twitchy because I absolutely wanted to use and say yes. But recovery is more important to me. It's okay that my first thought was an addictive craving; what matters is how I responded to it.


Dude was a bouncer at a now closed local after hours club. Used to be mean to me at the bar because I'm not attractive (he's no prize either tbh) he messaged me on POF "you're so beautiful" I replied with "you didn't think so when I used to go to the warehouse" he then called me names and blocked me. I've given up on dating tbh. Men don't respond in person (I am ugly af) and OLD just gets guys who think I'm easy


I really really relate to this. Signed: someone who is also ugly af


My worst OLD experience was a guy named Kirk whom I met off of Tinder and went out with a few times. After a few dates, I felt comfortable enough with him, he seemed like a good person, so I invited him to my place for a movie under the strict stipulation that sex **would not** happen. Well, sex happened, and it was most definitely against my wishes. That was in 2015 and was the last date I went on. I don't even know why I'm in this sub tbh.....


I’m so sorry that happened to you. You have every right to be wary of dating after and experience like that.


That is absolutely awful! Similar things have happened to my own friends and family, and I have some idea of the terrible long-lasting after-effects. Thank you for being courageous enough to share. I hope you find someone who is genuinely good for you. All the best from an internet stranger.


Had a date with a guy who wouldn’t show me his tattoos. I tried to sneak a peek on the date and I think they were religious, like a scroll with something from Leviticus on it. We did talk about tattoos for a while though. He said that my tattoos told him everything he needed to know about me. “I think I know exactly the type of person you are.” “Really, what type of person am I?” He then told me that he used to have issues with drugs and told me about his drinking habits. He told me that he thought having 16 drinks in one night was totally fine for someone in their 30s. I said, “Forgive me for saying this, but I think you have a drinking problem.” He got offended, then got up and left. I then had a nice drink at the bar with some ladies who witnessed what happened. I think the absolute worst though was the guy who couldn’t nail down plans, and when we finally did and I was all excited to go, his girlfriend wound up calling me the night before. I immediately blocked him everywhere and told his girlfriend everything she needed to know. She wanted screenshots of all of our conversations. I gladly sent them to her. She messaged me a few months later to tell me that she’d left him. She even moved out of state to get away from him. I’m glad that she’s safe and that I’m still single and not dating either one of these jokers.


Met up with a guy, we planned to go for a drink and food, almost walked straight past guy as he was much older and heavier than his pictures. He had bought me a prepackaged fruit salad. Turns out he’d bought it before work and it had been sat in his locker all day. Was upset I didn’t immediately open it. So I then did, he then immediately starts picking out the fruit he likes- with his fingers, before been offered some. Get to place and were sat in a booth, I keep a healthy distance (poor man didn’t smell the greatest) but he kept moving closer, so it was like a comedy bit with me moving away and him sliding closer until I’m hanging off the edge of the table. Order food- I order a pasta dish and he finds this weird (?!). Turns out he only eats burgers, chicken nuggets, and chips. Lives at home. Admits his mum (bearing in mind he’s over 25) has tried to get him to eat a wider variety but nope, wouldn’t even try pasta, curry, anything.


Wow sounds like a bad experience from start to finish. The fruit salad thing would have got me, especially if he just stuck his fingers in it like that and everything... eeek!


I don’t think mine is horrible. Just had a date years back with someone who basically talked about themself the entire time. Hardly let me get a word in. I was both impressed and highly disappointed. Lol


I had a date with a woman who was a vegan who didn't know that nails are made from protein, but thought that teeth were. But that wasn't the weirdest thing. She went on a 5-10 minute rant against polo shirts. I mean, she was really angry at them. "It's not a dress shirt, but it's not a T-shirt. It's like you can't commit." I do own polo shirts, but fortunately, since it was a cool evening and we were outside, I was wearing a long sleeve henley.


So I went to dinner with a guy I met online and he seemed nice. So we had both ordered, had a drink, some appetizers. Conversation seemed decent. Dinner was on the way then he said he had to go outside to make a phone call. So I waited. The food came. He still wasn’t back. I started eating mine. Still waiting, 30 minutes passed. I finished, paid the bill and walked outside. He was gone, his car was gone. He had picked me up at my car which was like a mile away. I had to walk a mile in the dark alone. I called him and he answered. I said wtf happened. He said he determined he was too short for me, which he was, but bailing in the middle if dinner and sticking me with the bill? Pretty lame. THEN he said he was sorry and asked if I would go out with him again. I laughed and said no thanks.


Love bad date stories! My last date the dude and I met at a bar, had pretty decent convo etc. then he stood up to go to get another drink and I got a full whiff of his asshole. It was as If it had never been washed. Then the most memorable one was where this dude took me to dinner but ordered for me and then spent the whole dinner talking about how he wishes he could say the N word because it would “make his stories better”, he was white. Then he invited me back to his apartment to help “set up his mattress” and when I got there it was a boxed mattress from Amazon (no shade but no set up required) and he asked if I wanted to “help flatten out the mattress”. I left shortly after and luckily never saw him again


Ewwww to both stories! Lol!!


I've had plenty of bad in person dates, but my recent WEIRD OLD convo, was I matched with a really nice looking, polite Asian man on bumble....his photos were of him playing piano, or other studious tasks. I figured, hey a nice guy, he will at least be polite. We made polite chit chat for 20 minutes or so, then he politely informed me he had printed off my dating profile and was currently masturbating onto my photos. Honestly the weirdest part was the fact he used a printer....


Who the fuck owns a printer


I matched with a guy on tinder in 2019. He loved dogs, nice smile, and he was an architect. He was rather void of emotion and sporadic in our messages to each other when he finally asked for my number. So I gave it to him. Big mistake. Instead of texting me once a day like he did on tinder, he texted me all day throughout the day. He would send me weird selfies I never asked for (nothing sexual), and would correct my word usage and have “edgy” humor. It was so odd. When I made a joke to my friends to call the police if they don’t hear from me the Tuesday night I was supposed to go on my first date with him, I realized I needed to cancel. So I did and he took it well. Except I forgot that my public instagram was connected to my phone number and he followed me immediately. He would dm me and be the first person to watch my instastories. But I’d ignore because I didn’t want to be a drama queen. After a few months, he unfollowed me and I thought ok that’s done. Except five months after the cancelled first date, he tried to match with me on a new dating profile I had just made. Except his profile said he was a fashion designer. This and other reasons made me go private on instagram. Then in December 2019, I made my instagram public again and he followed me almost immediately. So from then on until the fall of 2020, he would keep commenting on my instastories and I wouldn’t respond. I finally blocked him when he figured out where I was from one of my instastories (though it wasn’t too hard to find out at all) and sent me selfies hours later in the same place, saying he was just there.


Hi, i noticed you were creeped out by the fb friend request, he did a reverse image search and found your profile. If you care about your privacy in that sense, use pictures you haven't posted anywhere else. Have a great one :)


One of the more annoying things is the amount of married people or folk in relationships using the apps (both genders)


I've had guys admit to me that they either have a criminal record like they have served time for DOMESTIC VIOLENCE or that they like to push people's buttons and then attempt to try to annoy you throughout the date. Yeah, a lot of people need serious help that is all I have to say.....


Oh man.. here's the biggest one. I was long distance dating a man that I met on Hinge. He was 38, I was 34. I have 2 small kids so he and I would plan dates around my one day off. He lived 2 hours north of me so we would generally meet in the middle and hike, kayak, make out in my car. Lol. Always my car though but I didn't think anything of it. This all happened last year June 2020 til new years day. I didn't see him much at the end bc he switched from at home customer service to delivering overnight for Amazon centers. We would text often and call occasionally but I didn't think it was progressing enough when Thanksgiving rolled around and he didn't call me or respond to my texts. I got a little upset and he explained it away and then Christmas rolled around. I said, "I'm not planning anything with you or even to hear from you bc Christmas is about my kids, not you". Plus he was busy bc of Amazon. So after Christmas we still texted but I felt so off that it was very limited. New years eve rolls around and he barely says two words to me except for "happy new year, darlin" right at 12am. I say happy new year back and then don't hear from.him for 3 days. Super odd, we generally checked in daily. I let it go for a few more days then I finally call. A woman answers. Her voice is shaky. I say, "Is Will there?" She says, "You mean Bill?" And I said, "I mean, I guess. Umm... who is this?" And she goes - I shit you not - "I'm ___, Bill's fiance, I know all about you". I'm dead. Like fucking dead. We had talked about polyamory and that I had done it before and it wasn't for me and he had agreed. She told me that they were ENM and that she taught classes in it and everything. 🤣 She and I talked for hours and he lied about SOOOO much, even down to being a nonsmoker. (I hadn't even expressed a preference, he just decided to make up a character he thought I'd like) Why was she answering his phone though? That asshole had a heart attack! A few hours later on new years day at 3am he had a widowmaker heart attack and she saved his life. So on the one hand, he would have died without her there, on the other hand, he is now dead to me bc of all the lies. His heart attack saved *me*. Come to find out later, he was going to move down here, dump her, and continue dating me and never tell me about the beginning. He wanted to "escape polyamory". What the fuck, right? Oh there is so much more to it but holy forking shirtballs right? I had posted something like "Either my bf is getting eaten by his cats rn or I'm getting ghosted" before I knew what was going on. It wasnt either but the truth was somehow more twisted.


So I was on Badoo, and there was a tall, hot from the neck down man who said he spoke English on his profile (he was using google translate) that liked my profile. I liked his back. After the hi how are you’s, we talked a bit, and he told me he loved me. I laughed it off and said it was lust, haha. He backed down, and asked me on a date a few messages later. I knew it wouldn’t work by this point, but live action Aladdin was out in theaters, and he was a tall, super fit dude asking me on a date, and the convo wasn’t that awful other than the misconstrued emotion. We swapped numbers and texted before meeting up. So I agreed eventually. I show up, I mispronounce his name, he corrects me, and then tells me he loves me again, and says “see? I told you. I love you.” I knew at this point it would be an awkward evening. We got our tickets, and this is when I realized he didn’t speak English. He spoke Spanish to the employee to get the tickets. He said some other awkward trying to be romantic stuff, and we went into the theater. Eventually the difficult language barrier convo ended, and the movie started. He tried cuddling up, and kissing my ear, and literally it made my skin crawl. He took me home (it was cheaper than Uber), I thanked him, gave him a hug and left. I figured that would be that. Nope. He found me on Facebook apparently, guessing through my phone number which I don’t use on Facebook now, stole pictures of me and my kid, posted them to his Facebook and called us his family. I didn’t know this yet. He was still blowing up my phone, and I was trying to let him down easy. He did not take the hint. He was calling and I wasn’t answering, sending me videos of him pretending to be me telling him I love him too, and eventually showed up at my doorstep. I guess that free uber wasn’t free. He begged to go to dinner, and I didn’t want my neighbors to see, so I just went with him. That’s when he showed me his Facebook and I saw the pics of me and my kid. I freaked out on the inside but had to play it off. Luckily he was not a classy guy and wolfed down his food, and I got mine to go. When he dropped me off he thought he’d be sexy, and pulls out some lingerie he bought for me, in the wrong size (luckily it was flatteringly small). I told him it was the wrong size, and didn’t accept it. He looked disappointed, and I ran into my house, having escaped that awkward situation based on a dress size mixup. I blocked him on the dating app he met me on. I figured that would be enough of a hint. Nope. He kept texting me and calling despite me not ever answering. He found me on Snapchat and tried to add me on fb. Finally one day I took a nap. I woke up to god only knows how many messages, eventually including masses of crying faces. I took a two hour nap, not ignored him for days. I was working up to that still trying to cut him and not set off a giant stalker beast. I’d had enough. I blocked him on everything he found me on. When he showed up, my roomie (a formidably large man) answered the door and said I no longer lived here. If my roomie wasn’t home I locked everything and just stayed quiet when I heard someone around. Eventually he went away. Now that uber price is never too expensive.


I met this man on tinder. We met up at a local bar downtown and had a few drinks. He was a little edgier than I was used to but I like getting to know different kinds of people so I rolled with it. We kissed at the end of the night and I went home. We met up two more times after that at the same bar and he started to drop some hints that he was a little messier than I wanted. But nothing concrete. Eventually, I invited him over for dinner or something and we ended up chatting about past relationships where he revealed that he had 2 year old twin girls up in the Yukon that he walked out on because he had to. Just “had to”, no additional reason, other than mumbling about money. He was distraught so I comforted him by rubbing his shoulder and saying it’s okay, i understand. Then his whole demeanour switched and he said something like, “I could have you if I wanted.” Excuse me, what. I think I just said “I’m sorry?” And he looks me in the eyes with this mischievous look on his face, “right here, right now, nobody would know. I’m a lot stronger than you think.” I eventually convinced him to leave and he forced me into a hug where he bit my neck so hard I bruised. I texted him later that it was over and immediately blocked him. I ran into him a week or so later and he just stared at me like he was still plotting my murder. It’s been a few years but I don’t invite strange men over anymore.


Went on a date with one woman mid 30s to our version of Cannes film fest , was fun, heaps of chemistry, and BYO so getting a bit tipsy, kiss cam came round and we had a go, the event finished and we continued to hang out drinking in a nearby bar. She proposed taking me home to get laid, but I am not a good performer when Im drunk so I tried to say that, but just the 'ah no so I..' was enough for her to lose her shit. Like the bartender sideways looking and bouncers on alert. She gets up, still yelling, storms out, i finish my drink and go the other way. My phone starts blowing up, i block block block, then i hear her yelling at me again, she came back for more. So i just started running. Got away but the shit thing was i hadnt planned on the night going that long or drunkenly, rode my motorbike in and it was 3am and freezing, so i just laid on a park bench for nearly 4 hours 🥴 Another was out in the country but kinda near where my mum lives, and the woman was talking about relocating to near where i live so i thought fuck it i'll go meet her, ride the bike, visit mum along the way, no big deal. So we met up for breakfast, i initially thought she was Persian, she was really nice and we got on really well, i brought my 2nd helmet so suggested going for a ride up the nearby mountain which is also a racetrack, she was keen. So did that, had a blast, came back for lunch, was going great. Figured i had to get home as it was a 3 hour ride so i called it. Literally her energy changed, and says- 'if you wanna see this again... you're gona have to convert'. Me- 'huh? Convert to what?' Her- '(her religion)' Me- 😹 gtfo And i quickly got up and left, gearing up to get on my bike and bolt. She was pursuing me and kinda tried to stop me but i got the hell out of there, and again could feel me phone going nuts in my pocket. When i got to stop it was all kinds of messages, from apologies 'its just to keep my dad happy' to regret to anger to 'how dare you reject me' to 'i will end you, you have no idea' etc. I screenshot everything and sent one reply saying 'one more msg and it will all be forwarded to your boss and to the police'. Never heard from her again. Both 1st dates. Had heaps of shit ones but those 2 are my toppers.


I’ve had two experiences with dating that have definitely left an impression on me in a not good way. First one was before OLD, I was set up on a blind date with a friends coworker, she worked in a big warehouse and didn’t know him well but said he seemed nice and was single. So I meet him and he’s very nervous and shakey, like literally shaking, proceeds to tell me he’s a combat vet and has PTSD and gets anxious easily, so I’m pretty understanding with that. I was 21 at the time and my friend said she thought he was in his late 20s, nope he’s 39, he tells me. We don’t click, awkward conversation and he just was super nervous the whole time it made me feel weird. So I finished the date, went home and told him over the phone I wasn’t interested in perusing further. He said ok on the phone but when we hung up he started sending me text after text after text asking what he did wrong and if I would give him another chance. I politely said no I just didn’t feel it. Over the next few weeks he begins to stalk me, starting with sending me texts asking me what I’m doing, saying he saw me somewhere and texting me that he drove by my house and saw my car there etc. I came home from work one day to find a bouquet of flowers and a note from him on my doorstep saying that he thinks I’m an amazing person and wishes I’d give him another chance. After not getting what he wants his texts start to turn mean, starts telling me I’m a bitch, calling me names and trying to say no man will ever put up with me etc. Then he shows up to my fucking work and applies for a job, and texts me telling me he’s going to get a job with me- I let my employer know the situation and he wasn’t even considered. Eventually I told him I was going to call the police and he did stop. But days after I said that he went to work and made a bomb threat and was arrested. Went to jail for a bit, was fired from that job and a year after that he found his boss from that job and beat him with a baseball bat and is in prison. Psycho.


Match with someone on bumble, have 4 dates in February. I work in healthcare and am vaccinated, he’s not, we both talk about how breaking the touch barrier feels tricky. We hug after each date. I’m into him and he’s into me, we have similar interests, this seems good. It’s easy to send flirty messages between dates, and that’s when this happens: He finds a 5-year old photo of me from grad school on FB, wearing a t-shirt and jeans. He points out that another dating challenge in COVID is that you mostly meet people outside, and it’s been cold— so they’re wearing lots of layers (note: he has seen me in jeans and a t-shirt at this point; he knows what my body looks like). He screenshots the photo and asks if I still “have that body”. I tell him no (???? All of my OLD photos are recent, and this person has, at this point, hugged me 4 times in person. There’s about 15lbs of difference between this photo and my current body). I mention that my body composition is also really different now— I’m so much more active than I could be in grad school. We talk about activity/training and I say that I “don’t pursue thinness as a goal (because I do pursue lifting/hiking/climbing)”. He immediately says we shouldn’t see each other, he needs a partner who pursues thinness. I ask if he dislikes my current body shape, because up until now he’s been acting really attracted, and again, we’ve had 4 really lovely in-person dates. He clarifies that no, he likes my body… just not the way I think about it. Bullet dodged.


Fake name, fake age, likely bipolar. Criminal record and squatting in a luxury apartment. Later died in a shootout with cops.


At least they weren’t boring lol.


Some of these are funny, yet terrifying, and so hard to read because I genuinely cannot believe the shit people pull. But it all makes sense as to why I cannot get a date to save my life.


I don't have a lot of experiences with dating apps, and this story is kinda the reason. I've used Tinder for about two months when I finally had a match. I was taking my time and picking carefully, reading profiles, etc. The girl seemed super sweet, she was my type, yada yada. She started the conversation mentioning stuff from my profile, which led to a really nice conversation and instant connection. Unfortunately, she had vacation already planned for 3 days after we started talking. She would go to another country to visit her grandmother, and would stay away for one month. Sure, no problem there. She made sure to keep in touch, messages became call, that became video call and pictures of things she saw, ate, did, etc. She was really sweet. After three weeks, she can't stop talking about how incredible she thinks I am, how she wants to hug, cuddle, kiss and spend time. Cool! Sweet, good looking woman is totally into me and vice versa. What could go wrong, right? During the last day prior to coming back, she suggests I come to her place to visit. Made clear that there would be nothing sexual involved. Sure, I wasn't thinking of that. So she comes back, it's 35 celsius and I get two trains to go to her city, walk around till I find her place. She is wearing a jacket in a sunny and hot day. Weird, but ok. I sit on her couch and she sits far away across the couch. Windows are closed, the house is a pre heated oven, but she still wears the jacket. She suggests to watch a movie. Sure, whatever, let's just hang out. Instead of watching the movie or having a conversation, she is quiet hiding herself behind the jacket, like when you hide yourself from a baby. Weird. I'm naive (or dumb) enough to not leave. She wants to show me pics of her trip, I sit close and she gets upset. Ok, now I can't hide anymore that I'm bothered and she inquires what is wrong. I'm honest and say it right away. A monologue starts where she proceeds to tell me that it took six months for her to like her last boyfriend. I admit that I'm confused. Why are you telling me all this now after everything you've said during the past week? Guess what, in the meantime, I lost the last train home. I have to crash there. After some discussions, we go to sleep in separate rooms. She gives me a fan and go away. After an hour she opens the door, comes in with TWO blankets and lay close to me, claiming it's too hot (which is, but why the blankets?). I ignore and try to sleep a bit, thinking that I just needed to survive till morning and go home. During the night she tries to make moves and I try to get away. Everything I can think of is going home asap. Morning, she offers me to take a shower. I just want to go home. She offers me food, brush my teeth, a myriad of other things. I just wanna go home. She doesn't take that as an answer and gets mad. I'm grabbing my stuff and she starts to yell "ARE YOU RUNNING AWAY?" and "ARE YOU GOING TO LEAVE ME ALONE?", among other things. I try to calm her down (huge mistake) and explain that I'm tired and need some time to think. More yelling, she starts to throw stuff at me. First, pillows, than shoes, than books. I open the door and run, just run for some good ten minutes. Far enough from her place, I walk to the train station. Half way home, I receive around 50 messages: THIS WAS AMAZING! I ALREADY MISS YOU SO MUCH! WHEN ARE WE GOING TO SEE EACH OTHER AGAIN? THIS WAS TRULY FANTASTIC. Although I've blocked her, she sent me texts with other numbers for a couple months after that. She came to the city I live and tried to meet me, I just didn't care. Finally left me alone. ​ Thing is: I'm a magnet for these types of situations. Never again.


I encountered love bombing before knowing what it was and felt like I finally found someone who understood me and wanted to hangout with me but then they bailed after I had drove an hour to go and meet them. Par the course for OLD but experiencing that blind and trying to rationalize what was happening really stung. Giving someone a second chance because they seemed great and that something just came up only to be stood up again hurts a lot too, more so to the self worth because I had fallen for it once more. (I say "it" and not "them" because really it was the situation that I kept falling for) Initially telling myself that "hey they had an issue and things are different now" but then realizing that I just wanted someone to notice and care for me. If I've learned anything from OLD it's that giving someone more of something they don't appreciate already won't make them appreciate me more. And I really had to learn to love who I was and want to be around me before trying to rely so heavily on someone else for validation. No one is ever intentionally malicious, but not many people are quick to care for what essentially amounts to a stranger. So I really needed to refrain from trusting people as much as I did initially. Now I'm struggling with the opposite in that I don't let anyone in ever, I guess this is what my 'baggage' would be lol. Initially I was approaching dating looking for someone to make every part of my life fall into place, but the reality is, no one is capable of doing that, and it's not right to put that expectation on anyone. Instead I've started to do what I want to do and enjoy what I want to enjoy while living a sustainable life. I'm hopeful that my life today is interesting enough for someone to want to join up with and come along for, but I'm also trying to keep it interesting enough that I'll be happy when that someone inevitably, never shows up.


> If I've learned anything from OLD it's that giving someone more of something they don't appreciate already won't make them appreciate me more. I needed to read this after the week I’ve had on OLD.




Omg this is so bad. Lol an essay!!! Yes, I’ve learned not to connect my social media lol


My first name is uncommon. I’ve gotten Facebook messages from guys from OLD that I didn’t even match with. Maybe they thought that maybe I would be impressed that they found me? Hell no!


I met a guy on Bumble and was excited to meet him — he was handsome, tall and seemed intelligent based on his profile. I couldn’t meet up for a few days so he asks to have a phone call. On the call, he starts asking me questions like “What’s most important to you in your next relationship?” and “What are your dealbreakers?” I give normal answers like “They need to be committed to personal growth.” He gives a few odd answers like “They need to be on birth control.” The grand finale was that one of his dealbreakers is someone that wants him to go down on them. He tries to defend it with “but I have a good reason” and proceeds to explain that he wants to protect himself and his partner from STDs, but that he’s okay with his partner going down on him. Just mind blowing.


Matched with this girl on bumble one time, things were great me and her had a lot of common she was into the same stuff I was into etc etc. The conversation of jobs come up I don’t like disclosing the name too quick as it’s a pretty big company. She tells me she is a mortician, okay cool never met anyone who was a mortician or even wanted to get into that industry but it sounded dope. We ended up going on the first date and when I tell you this girl was obsessed with embalming , I’m talking about OBSESSED. The entire date she was talking about embalming and her ideas for wanting to get tattoos related to embalming and how peaceful she found herself when she was embalming. I tried changing the conversation but she would just make her way back to it and I was like okay this is fucking weird now.


This is my worst OLD story I posted on r/japanlife a couple weeks ago but I think it also fits well here. Enjoy. Gather round kids and I will regale you with my tale of "Juice Man." This date happened when I came to Japan for the very first time in 2014 as a study abroad student. I met this guy on a dating app and we talked for about 3 weeks before meeting. His profile said he was about 24 or 25 and I was 23 at the time. At that point I had only had about 3 years of undergrad Japanese study - so basically I sucked at it and could hardly speak anything. He also couldn't speak any English so its a real wonder why I even agreed to go on a date with him in the first place, but I digress. So the day comes and he says he will pick me up in his car. I get gussied up, leave my dorm and meet him at his car. I immediately notice two things: 1. He is at LEAST 10-15 years older than his profile says. Like, this guy could have been the father of the guy in the pics. 2. When he opened his mouth, he had the most rancid, putrid breath I have ever smelled in my life. Every crack of his mouth sent a chill down my spine with how absolutely terrible his breath smelled. He obviously was a avid smoker and his teeth were very, very brown. Like somewhere between Raw Sienna and Sepia on the Crayola Crayon spectrum. At this point I am thankful that he cant speak English and almost insist that he use the translating app to speak for him - just so he would stop opening his mouth. Through the app he admits right away that he is embarrassed for lying about his age and how he looked. I, trying to be nice and realizing that I am now at his mercy in his car, assure him that everything is just fine (Narrator: It wasn't.). The plan for the date was to go to this nearby mall and do a little shopping and have lunch. So we are heading over and I am taking very measured breaths all the way there. Along the way he realized that he forgot his wallet at home but says he's not far from his house. So he drops me off at this nearby sporting good store to wait for him while he drives back to his house to get his wallet. Around 10 minutes later he texts me that he's outside and I come out. He has retrieved his wallet and along with it, this gigantic, half drunken JUG of fruit juice. He hops out the car with this big ass jug of juice and is just taking huge swigs out of it like a swarmy pirate - backwash and everything. I am just in awe of how obscenely large this jug is and also how he was able to single-handily turn regular fruit juice into a brown viscous liquid. Ever the gentleman, he gestures the jug towards me and offers me some. I politely decline. So now we are on are way to the mall - him gulping down his juice and me taking tiny gulps of air like a fish trying to hold it together. We get there and I've decided in my head to hurry up and eat lunch and make up some excuse to end this date as soon as possible. So we look around the mall for a bit and I am making sure to keep a healthy distance from him because his breath has amazing reach, y'all. We quickly have lunch and I manage to get him to end the date and bring me back to my dorm. He must have sensed that I was not into him at all and this date was not going to well because he starts rambling. Once we hope back into the car, he uses the only English he knows to try and salvage this date. His idea is to start listing every single Black celebrity that he can think of to "compliment" me (I'm a Black female). He starts off with, "You look like Whitney Houston!" I most certainly do not look like Whitney Houston. When that didn't work, he just starts naming them one after the other - "Janet Jackson! Beyoncé!" I'm thinking how in the hell can I look like all these people at the same time??? The last name really threw me for a loop - "Jessica Alba!" She's not even BLACK??!! I'm awkwardly laughing him off and breathing through the tiny crack in my window, just praying for him to reach my dorm already. Finally we get there and I get out and dash over to my dorm (in a roundabout way - didn't want him to know which one I stayed in) and breathe in deeply for the first time in 2 hours. He later sent me a barrage of messages - I didn't read them just deleted and blocked him. Worst date ever. Epilogue: For at least 2 years after that date, I would occasionally for no reason at all, smell of waft of his breath. Still not to keen on dark fruit juice either.


If the woman had not wanted a second date, I would definitely wonder if this would have qualified as a bad date for her. From my perspective, it was not so bad, but definitely memorable... After a few days of hitting it off, a woman and I decided to go on a date. I told her about an upcoming improv show that I was wanting to go to, having never been to one, and asked if she would like to join. It was Library Night at the theatre, so they let audience members bring books in from home. They’ll read a page or two and then act it out. Thought this was a super fun idea. Anyways, I tell her about Library Night. She forgets her book, but I brought two just in case: The River of Doubt by Candice Millar and The Complete Short Stories of Mark Twain. Handed her the Twain copy and we walk in. Idk if y’all have ever been to a local improv show, but you are -right there- in front of the actors. I didn’t find the show that evening to be particularly funny, but I felt pressure to laugh because it was so intimate. I mean, we could see the whites of each other’s eyes. There were like five audience members, too, so the pressure is even higher. Of course, my date gets called on to present a book that is not even hers. She handled the spotlight like a pro, though, and handed the book over to a cast member. The actor, bless his heart, flips to THE most gruesome page of ANY page that Twain has ever written. It’s from a short story, titled “The Mysterious Stranger”, about an angel boy named Satan (not THE Satan, but a cousin) visiting a small Austrian mountain town. Satan does various deeds, both good and bad, fun and mischievous. It’s Twain’s satirical commentary on religion, something he’s known for and mastered IMO. This particular scene is when the town drunk beats his dog to a pulp. The actor is on stage—during an improv show mind you—reading aloud the story of a dog getting beaten so gruesomely and so horribly. At one point, from being beaten so badly, Twain describes the dog’s eye popping out... The crowd is dead silent and the cast is like WTF. Meanwhile, knowing that this just happens to be a *random ass* gruesome scene of an otherwise lighthearted collection of stories, I am over here DYING with laughter at the fact that they have to act this shit out now. Talk about a knee-slapper! I was howling with laughter in a silent crowd of five people. It was the only sincere laughter I had in that theatre that night. My date, bless her heart too, was laughing, but I think probably because she felt awkward in the situation. She’s probably thinking, “Wtf is this?! Who is this guy?! This is not my book!” They acted it out. It was horrible. We stayed for the rest of the show and decided to go to our separate homes afterwards. She, for whatever reason, wanted a second date, but I wasn’t really feeling it. Saw her again a few weeks later at a local festival, no problem. Can’t remember her name or anything, but all I remember is that outrageous series of moments and how hard I was laughing at that improv show. OLD’ing can be a hoot sometimes. Most of my dates have been bad enough that I don’t want a second date, but this one was bad in the best way possible, lol. Thanks for listening (if you made it this far)!




I texted with a woman for three days and we got along great, she had a great sense of humor, was interested in the same things I was. I asked her out, she said yes can we go to the Saltgrass steakhouse? I said sure and made reservations. I picked her up and asked her questions on the way and got one word replies. We got seated immediately and as we’re sitting there I keep trying to talk to her and still the one word answers. She wanted some red wine (she had ordered the 22 oz ribeye) I ordered fish so I got a nice white wine. The waiter poured us each a glass and our salads came (she also ordered the soup). When the main course came, she dug in and half way through her steak she had finished her bottle of wine and grabbed mine and filled her glass up. I didn’t get anymore wine. She then ordered a Long Island ice tea. She finished her steak (fat, garnishes and everything). I didn’t finish my fish (somehow I lost my appetite), that was ok she ask the waiter to save my leftovers for her. The only two word thing she said to me all night was thank you. I told her she was welcome. Tried to text her the next day and ghosted. To this day I really don’t know what happened.


Woah sounds like she used you for a free meal. Was this a first date? I’m surprised you said yes to a steakhouse on a first date.


I don’t mind the expense, I like to eat at nice places. I just wonder what happened to that sweet, sincere, funny woman I had been talking to. She had a good job so she wasn’t starving. I’m just baffled.


I went on a date with an anaesthetist who, about 5 minutes into our first date, started listing all the things in the bar around us that could be made into a sedative to drug people with. I went to the “toilet” and never returned. Another guy said he had tickets to a comedy club free with work and asked me if I wanted to go. Turn up and his colleague was also there as there were 3 tickets, and he spent the entire evening trying to turn it into a threesome. Went on (yet) another date and the girl genuinely tried to recruit me as her down line to sell younique (an MLM for anyone not in the loop). Last week, I matched with a guy and exchanged a few sentences then had a 12 hour shift so didn’t get back to him. In that time he’d found me on Instagram and Facebook (without my last name??) and added me and bombarded me with messages on both asking me why I wasn’t responding. I could go on…


So met a guy on OLD and talked for over 4 months. He said he was military so it was almost exclusively texting. He asked for my address I refused then on the third ask I agreed. Well a month later I get random credit cards. I ask if he knows about these he says yes and starts giving me weird instructions on how to use them and what money I’m sending to him. I say uhh no. So then he starts threatening to kill me. For two weeks I get constant death threats all day long. Called the cops several times. It stopped. Not nearly as scary but a guy I talked to for over a month we finally had our dates line up and we’re going to meet up when he got off work. He texted me ok I’m free and within 30 seconds I got a never mind I guess you’re mad at me and we aren’t getting together… that was 2 months ago and no follow up to my “uhh what?”


I met this girl I'd been talking to for a few days from okcupid. We'd hit it off and I went to a date with her at a bar in the city, and we played card games with a few other drinking friends. Great time, but she kept buying me alcohol and at one point encouraged me to smoke weed with her. I obliged, then too drunk to drive home I went back to her place. So, I didn't know what Netflix and chill was. We're sitting there awkwardly when all of a sudden her ex shows up at the window, demanding I give him his random objects back, at which point I say, "Look, I don't know you, and I don't know who actually owns anything here. No." Before he leaves, he tells me that she's going to break my heart, then takes off. She recommends we lay down, and so we go to her room, and long story short eventually we bumped uglies. I thought this meant she was interested in a relationship. Nope. Just wanted to see what I had in my pants. Went to see her again and she mostly ignored me, flirted with other men, and then was upset that I told her it was messed up to use people for sex. Got incredibly wasted that night, ended up at some house party where I passed out for a minute on a couch. Woke up to a 30 something guy hitting on a boy that was obviously like 15. Told him to fuck off, found the girl when she walked out of a room filled with 6 guys (I really don't want to know) and got a ride back to my car. Passed out again in the car until I was sober, then went home with one eye open because I had a head splitting headache. Then I had a UTI that may very well have been from having sex with her without protection. Needless to say, I now am much more deliberate and conscious about who I decide to date, and don't sleep with people on the first date.


I have a lot, but I’d say these are probably among the more memorable. Matched with a guy. Good looking, Ivy League education, successful. Great texting banter in the beginning. Seemed to have great manners, no red flags. Planned to meet up but he had to reschedule for a few weeks later. Seemed fine. He started texting me more and more leading up to the date. Nice to chat with but I’d prefer to meet someone sooner rather than later. THEN one night he sends me pictures of him and his ‘best friends.’ They were all stuffed animals. They each had names and full backstories. He told me they slept with him every night but don’t worry, he explained to them that they would have to sleep on his desk if he had an overnight guest. I obviously cancelled the date. A month later he sent me a FB friend request. Another guy asked me out for drinks and some live music. I assumed a bar. He asked me to meet him at the corner of two streets. Then he lead me into a show at a theater. Right before the lights went down he informed me it was a 4 hour opera that was all in (I think?) Italian. Then he informed he that he was really excited to be on a date with someone as intelligent as him as he had done some research and somehow found out that I had gotten the exact same SAT score as him. He also had a lazy eye that did not show up in his pics. Much more on this guy and drinks after but trying to keep it semi-brief.


Hooked up with a murderer (I didn't know.) They did very non-consensual things in the boudoir.


What the fuck? I’d ask for the story but I get if you aren’t comfortable talking about it.


I went on one date with a dude. The next day he drove an hour to come to my work and deliver a huge bouquet of flowers. I hadn’t told any of my coworkers I was moved out and getting a divorce. This dude really embarrassed me and forced me to have conversations with coworkers I didn’t want to have. Grand gestures like that are so inappropriate.


Matched on OKC. Had good convo, agreed to meet up in a public spot closer to him than me. He has a VERY common first and last name. Something similar to Dave Smith. So he was hard to look up. He met me at the agreed upon bar. He was already drunk. Told me he lived above the bar, with his three kids, who all had different mothers. The most recent of which had a restraining order against him. That he had violated. Multiple times. But it’s okay, it was her fault, according to him. The bar was a shit hole. We were out on the patio. I never got the drink I ordered, and felt no need to order another, so I got up to leave before the date could get any worse. He got up, too. And quick as spit, for a drunk guy, he pushed me against the patio fence and tried to tongue-kiss my whole face. I took a break from dating. The next date I went on, a year later, I made a joke. Something like, “please don’t try to weirdly kiss me.” He did not, and now were engaged.


In my early dating days, around age 19, I was talking to a guy from POF for a couple of weeks before we met up. I was really into our conversations and had a false sense of intimacy. He only had one picture and it was one someone with green eyes, a thin nose and straight black hair. Honestly now think I was dumb to believe someone would have that shade of green eyes, it was clearly fake now. He wanted to go to this restaurant at 10pm on a Saturday. I had waited weeks to meet him so I accepted it and just decided why the heck not even though it was dead of winter and the drive was treacherous. He said he was going to be late… 30 minutes apparently. The restaurant closed at 11. He gets out of the car… it’s not the guy in the picture. This guy had a wide nose, brown eyes and curly brown hair. I thought it must not be him but then he says my name. It is him. I am stunned, but I didn’t know what a catfish was at the time. He was actually cute so it was weird to me that he would use a fake photo. I just went with the date and decided to push myself through it. I didn’t call him out because I was questioning my own sanity, was it the same guy in the picture and I’m wrong? The bar closes after 30 minutes. He pays and I have a chance to pull out my phone and look at his profile picture. It’s clearly not the same face at all, and I realized I need to trust my own gut. I decided to ghost him, not a choice I would make now but I was pretty immature back then. His last ditch effort with me was to tell me he was diagnosed with cancer. I blocked him. I wish I had been brave enough at the time to call him out.


Waited an hour for a girl and within 5 minutes she told me she'd fucked over 100 guys from tinder ...and yes, I joined the list. She was insane but what else was I gonna do?